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Saturday, September 08, 2007

"Every day is a winding road"

I'm realizing every single day has the potential to be very challenging... and it's up to me not to allow these days to be disastrous.

Yesterday was a LONG day at work and I was CRABBY when I left there. The worst thing about PMS for me, however, is having to drive with other cars on the road. I have little tolerance for inconsiderate and moronic drivers on the best of days... but when I'm PMS'ing... I honk my horn at anyone who just looks at me the wrong way... so by the time I get home poor Alex is forced to deal with my mood... and sometimes there is just nothing he can do to turn it around for me... it's just a matter of decompressing from my drive and letting it all go... and eventually I was able to do that last night... but not before I had a moment where I seriously wondered if he would leave me after seeing the moods I am capable of having!!! haha!!

I seriously could have sabotaged myself yesterday. I was stuck in a meeting room all afternoon at work and there were a huge platter of sweets... all chocolate (have I mentioned my sweet tooth? my affinity for chocolate? my lack of will power?)... and I resisted. I think had I been in the room alone, I would have caved... but my new motto is "jog like nobody's watching, eat like somebody is"... so, luckily... I found my will power.

I came home feeling like I was STARVING... so then I'm forced to deal with the demons of NOT snacking before Alex gets here. I caved and I had a snack (when my stomach's growling... I know it's not psychological, I KNOW I'm hungry)... I had a cheese string and 1/2 fig newton cookie (gave chicklet the other half, she loves those things).

Then Alex and I (being we are trying to eat healthier together now... no more burgers and wings and fries for him every week) went to subway to get a sub for dinner. I had my typical turkey breast sub - Tara style!

I was worried about having SOMETHING for dessert... just figuring I would need something sweet. I even wanted to go to the grocery store and buy frozen yogurt. Alex didn't want to do that... so we came home... ate our subs... watched restaurant makeover... and forgot all about dessert and anything sweet! I managed to not eat anything the rest of the night!!!!

Today I went to Shoppers to get 20x the points (stocked up on method products, air wick oils, and the spectro jel face stuff... which I'll use in combination with proactiv for now... make the proactiv last longer too!)... I came home and WENT ON THE TREADMILL! I had NO pain, but I'm definitely feeling tightening of the muscles in my calves and shins... I'm learning I need to just go slower and condition myself back into this activity... when I go slower, I don't feel pain... that has to tell me something.

I'm working on 7A (sickkids) for the evening... 3:30-11:30... haven't decided if I'll make dinner or take one of my smart ones frozen dinners!

Anyway, here's my food for the day:

*3/4c shredded wheat n' bran (1) - with my splenda/cinnamon mixture on top and flax seed
*10 almonds (2)
*1/2c skim milk (1)

*1c ww pasta (3)
*1/2c skim milk (1)
*1 tbsp cheese powder (0)
*1 tbsp ff sour cream (0)
*portabello veggie patty (2)

*cheetos 100 cal (or sunchips) - (2)

Dinner - TBD!!! I may try the lasagna florentine smart ones (6)
*100 cal oreos pack (2)

Happy Saturday!!

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